


Way To Go Strider

by orphan_account



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Drinking, F/M, Feels, M/M, Rose Is Sick Of You Shit Dave, i don't know why I'm tryint to write a chapter fic again, im sorry for this
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-07-12
Updated: 2013-11-17
Packaged: 2017-12-19 06:33:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 3,630
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/880553
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Alternately entitled: In Which Dave Turns 21, Gets Drunk, Does Stupid Things, And The Author Can't Write.</p><p>(NOW ON HIATUS)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Happy B-Day Over A Bottle A' Vodka

**Author's Note:**

> I have nothing to say, except I'm sorry for this abomination.

You're name is Dave Strider and you are not drunk. You swear to god, you are sober as a judge. John is completely wrong. You are not even tipsy.

You fall flat on your face. So maybe you're a bit tipsy. But it's John's fault anyway! He had the genius idea to celebrate your 21st at the shittiest bar in town. Somethin' 'bout his girlfriend bein' the barmaid and gettin' you cheep drinks. 

"Yo, Vris, 'nother round down here please!" You had finally scrambled back up to your stool and Vriska is glaring at you. 

"You have had plenty, Strider. John is going to kill me. You are fucking waaaaaaaasted!" She's looking at you like you're fucking nuts. Vris is a cool chick, when she's not cutting you off. Or making out with John in your bathroom. You have no idea how that one happened.

"Damnit, Vris. It's my birthday, ain't ya s'posed to spoil me? Sing happy b-day over a bottle a' vodka?" You give her your best charming grin. How the hell is John still in the bathroom; he needs to come tell his girlfriend to provide you with more booze. Oh, wait, there he is.

"Jooooooooooohn, spider-bitch won' give me my drink." She flips you off over his shoulder. You stick your tongue ' out at her. John raises his eyebrows at you. He opens his mouth to reply, but you interrupt him mid word. 

"Ya know, I love Vris. She's super cool an' all, but she's bein' too damn responsible, Christ. Vriska, sweetheart, beautiful enchantress, queen of spiders, lady of luck, mistress of-" John puts his hand over your mouth. 

"One, stop flirting with her, it won't work. I told her to watch how much you drank. I don't want you vomiting in my car. Second, it's time to go home. You are drunk. Very drunk."

"I am perfectly sober. 'M not even slurrin' yet." He looks at you like you have a third head and wings. 

"Let's go." Grabbing your arm, he drags you out of the bar. Damn, the little fucker is strong. The ground decides it misses the company of your face. 

You lay, slightly disoriented, until you see him looking down at you, face scrunched up in concern. Damn he's so fuckin cute. Nope, not doin' this right now. 

John picks you up, carrying you to his car. Wow, he looks really nice. He's still dressed pretty fancy from you actually party, which Bro and John worked together to set up. Bro wanted it to be in a strip club. John chose a more classy venue: the dinning hall of your local fire department. 

John drops you onto the seat of his car. You fumble with the buckle before giving up. John reaches over and fixes it for you.

"'M really not tha' drunk, I swear."

"Whatever makes you feel better Dave." Well he's smiling, so you guess he had a good time. You absolutely love seeing him happy. It reminds you of his thirteen year old self, the first time you met. You can never forget the blinding smile that lit up his face when he saw you.

"Earth to Dave, I asked if you wanna head to your place or just come with me to my house, which is closer."

"Oh uh, yours, 'm tired." He nods, making a left. You have no clue why he willingly volunteered to be your designated driver. But hey, you got to get drunk and didn't have to walk home. You aren't complaining.

You pull up in front of his house and he helps you out of the car. "I was hoping you would be even slightly sober. I have another gift for you that I couldn't really bring to the party."

"Whatcha get me?"

"You have to come see."

He leads the way to his living room, you trailing close behind. The lights flick on as you walk past him and go to the new addition to the room: a large blanked covered object.

"Go on, check it out." He almost seems nervous, but at the same time he's grinning that cheesy smile you love so much. Er, well, like. 

You pull back the cover and stare in shock at the custom turntables. The casing is bright red, emblazoned with your logo: interlocking gears with Tuntech written across the center. These must have cost a fortune.

John clears his throat and you realize you've been staring for like ten minutes. You turn around to meet his anxious gaze. "Do you like them. I hope i got the logo ri-" You grab him in a huge hug.

"How the hell did you get something like this made?!"

"Heh, I had to a bit of internet searching. So you like it?"

"Fucking hell, I love it." He grins and you can't resist. Later you'll tell yourself that it was because he looked so much like that adorable thirteen year old kid that had been your best friend. You'll say it was because you were drunk and you weren't thinking straight. 

Actually, you kissed your best friend because you have spent years wanting to do so. All of the other reasons were just small factors. You kissed John because you have loved him so damn long it hurt. 

Then your senses come back and you pull away, thankful for the shades that cover you eyes, hiding the emotional turmoil that would otherwise be obvious. 

"'M going to bed, night John." You hurridly walk to his spare room, which was really just your room, and flop onto the bed. Way to fuck everything up. Nice going Strider. He hates you, you know it. 

And that thought breaks the dam you built up for years, holding back all of the tears you wanted to cry. The pain you felt everytime you saw him kiss some one else, heard him say 'I love you' to whatever silly girl he was dating that week. For the fisrt time in years, you, Dave Strider, cried yourself to sleep.


	2. Thank The Gods Of Coffee And Painkillers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dave is too hungover to function and John is confused

You woke up with the worst hangover you have ever been subjected to in your life. Your head was pounding causing you to let out an agonized moan. The sound was absorbed by the pillow where you had burried your face. You were terrified to face the sun, knowing you hadn't closed the curtains last night. But your mouth was dry and you throat hurt, coaxing you into the light in search of liquid.

Now, you know you had forgotten to close the curtains because it had hit you, as you cried yourself to sleep, that you would regret it in the morning. Yet the room was dark, the light obstructed by your dark red curtains you had made John buy you. What the hell?

Ugh all this detective bullshit was killing you. First stop: ibuprofen and some extra strong coffee. John was at work, so you were safe from his questioning for now. You had no idea what you were going to say to him, but you had three hours think.

You slunk out of your room intent on getting the pot started, only to find coffee already made and two pills laying on the table. Before you could thank the gods of coffee and painkillers, you realized that John was not at work as he should have been; instead he was sitting at his dinning room table regarding you with a sympathetic expression. Oh shit.

"You probobly have one hell of a hangover. I decided to be nice and help you out. Do even remember anything from last night?"

There it was, your easy way out. But part of you didn't want to take the easy way out. And sadly that part seemed to control your mouth. "Yeah, mostly. Did I really flirt with Serket?"

He grins at you, although it looks forced. "Yup. Shamelessly, might I add."

"Oh god, please kill me now."

He laughed, but stopped abruptly. "Do you remember anything after the drive home?"

"Uh... yeah. Yeah, I do."

"May I ask why?"

"Why what?"

"Don't play stupid with me, Dave. You know exactly what." He went from mildly sympathetic and nervous to really pissed off and you were starting to regret not taking the easy way out. "Dave, why did you kiss me?"

"Cuz I was drunk off my ass and not thinkin straight and it seemed like a good idea and it will never happen again cuz it meant absolutly nothin. There, feelins jam is done, I'm gonna go hide in my room till I feel like fifty percent better and then go home. And maybe never touch a beer again."

"Dave, we are not done here! I know you, I can tell when you're lying."

"How bout we don't discuss my honesty right now." With that, you took off towards your room, ignoring him when he yelled at you to come back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did you like this chapter? Feel free to comment with anything you like or dislike.
> 
> Ps: how do i get the notes from the other chapter off this one?


	3. It's More Of A Lilac, Don't You Think?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rose is not pleased with Dave's life choices. At all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't get used to fast updates this is probobly the only time you will get two chapters in as many days. Also i have no clue how to color the text?

Your headache had waned under the magical power of ibuprofen. But you still put off leaving the room, desperate to avoid John and any questions he still had. 

Finally you heard the door open and Serket's voice invaded the house. You could here her arguing about something whith him. Shortly after, she dragged John out. Which meant it was safe to take off. You had never been more thankful of her stubbornness than you were today.

You snagged your dirty clothes on the way out of your room. You found your phone in the living room on top of your new turntables, chirping its battery low sound. You shoved it into your pocket and tried to find an easy way to carry your new equipment. You'd better come back for that.

With all of your stuff in hand, you left the house and set off for your own. Uncomfortable talk successfully dodged. Or not, because at that moment your phone rang.

TT: What do you think you are doing, David?  
TT: He told me what happened.  
TT: He also told me that you attempted to play it off as meaningless.   
TT: We both know it was far from meaningless. So start talking, Strider.  
TG: calm your fuckin tits lalonde  
TG: cant a guy get his phone out before being bombarded by purple.  
TG: actually its more of a lilac dont you think  
TG: sorta violet with a pink cast  
TG: not like your sisters blinding pink  
TG: dear god that hurt to look at  
TT: You are rambling. Get to the point.   
TT: Or are you just stalling?  
TG: uh  
TT: Thats what I thought.   
TT: Why won't you just tell John how you feel?  
TT: Why make it worse on yourselves?  
TG: lets see  
TG: hes in a relationship  
TG: with a girl  
TG: so wrong team  
TG: since hes mister im not a homosexual  
TG: shall i go on  
TG: hes my best friend  
TG: he will hate me  
TG: hell be pissed that i kept it from him  
TG: hanging out with him will be awkward as fuck  
TG: oh and dont forget that HE WILL HATE ME  
TT: Stop.   
TT: I can still see you typing, so delete whatever witty remark you wish to spew and listen for a change.  
TT: He is in a relationship with a girl who has very little in common with him, along with several garingly obvious personality flaws. It won't last long if I know John.   
TT: He is dating a girl. This does not mean that he has no interest in males. Sexuality doesn't work that way.   
TT: And he made that comment when he was thirteen and Karkat flirted with him in math class. A lot has changed since then.  
TT: He is your best friend, which means he will be more accepting than you think. Just don't make an issue out of it.  
TT: He has every right to be pissed at you. You have been infatuated with him for three years! He had a right to know a long time ago.  
TT: It is only awkward if you let it. Make a joke, don't act any different than you normally would.  
TT: And he will not hate you. One stupid crush isn't enough to ruin ten years of friendship, dumbass.  
TT: Your arguements have all been invalidated. And since he's your best friend, you owe him the truth. Or else, I will tell him.


	4. No Witty Line To Use For This One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> John and Vriska have a night out and things go downhill

You're still waiting for Dave to stop being a pussy when Vriska shows up. She knocks on your door, eight sets of eight bangs, until you open it. Grinning, she grabs your hand without so much as a 'hello'. You're halfway out of the door before you stop her.

"Uh hi, Vris. Where are we going?"  
She stops, and glares at you.

"It's a suprise~! I can't tell you, dumbass." She continues to pull on your hand, but you stand your ground.

"Vriska, can we please do this later, I'm a bit busy."

"Lemme guess, your boyfriend's here, ain't he?"

"Huh?"

"Strider, stupid. Thats why your 'busy'. He's still here. So you can't hang out with me cuz you've gotta be stuck up his ass."

"No! I mean... kinda... but not for the reason you think! I'm having a few issues right now, and yes, they do involve Dave. But I'm trying to fix it!"

"So what happened? He insult your magic tricks?" She sneered at you, flashing her abnormally long canines.

"No! And why are you being so mean right now? What did i do to piss you off?"

"I'm fucking sick of you blowing me off for that asshole! You're always so busy with your 'best friend' that you never have time for me anymore!" She's glaring at you, and you kind of feel bad. You have been ignoring lately.

"Alright, fine. Where are we going?" You close the door behind you. This thing with Dave could wait until tonight.

Her grin instantly returned. "We are going out. Now come on~!" 

—

Your phone rang. Checking the caller ID, you saw that it was Rose. Looking up, you saw Vriska glaring over at you from the crowd of dancers packed into the clubs main area. You were sitting at the bar, drinking a beer, and watching her mingle with the other club-goers.

You slid your phone back into your pocket. Rose could wait, you'd call her back when you get home. Vriska smirked at you, gesturing for you to join her.

As you stood up, you felt your phone vibrate and faintly heard your text tone over the music in the club. Quickly, you checked the messege.

TT: Damnit, John,answer your fucking phone, its important. I'm going to call you, and if you ignore me this time, I will make sure you never sleep peacefully again!

Just as you finished reading, your phone started ringing again. Quickly you answered it.

"I'm busy! I'll call you back later!"

"No, you most certainly will not, Johnathan Egbert. We are talking now, not later. Now go find somewhere quiet and listen!"

"Fine. But make it quick!" You hurried outside, where the music was much quieter. "Now what do you want!?"

"I spoke with Dave. He has agreed to talk to you, although I'm not sure if he intends to go through with it."

"He hasn't called me, or even texted me yet. Knowing him, he's probobly going to put it off."

"Well, it would be understandable. The situation is not one that invites easy discussion. Contrary to his words, he is uncomfortable with what happened."

"Well he should be. He fucking kissed me! What the hell was up with that?!"

"He has promised to explain everything."

"Since when does Dave Strider ever just explain everything?" Before she can reply, you hear someone clear their throat behind you. Turning around, you are greeted by your very pissed off girlfriend. Her blue eyes are blazing and she looks like she wants to kill you.

"As fucking usual, your friends are more important than me. Way to fucking ignore me as usual. I'm done playing games with you John! Fuck you. You can find yourself another girl to ignore, cuz we're done." She storms back inside, her blonde hair swishing behind her. Damnit!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did i do good?


	5. Yeah, I Ain't Got I Title For This One Either

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Haha, I cant write kissing oh god. Also, this is horrible.

He calls you, and you're pretty sure he's been crying, but mostly, he sounds pissed. 

"She fucking broke up with me! Over one god damn phone call! What the actual fuck?! I'm supposed to ignore my friends, in favor of listening to her bitch all the god damn time?! Now why the fuck should I do that?!"

"Bro, calm down. Why don't you come over to my place? I've got some vodka and I'm fairly sure there's still a couple of beers in the back of my fridge. Come on over, get drunk, and forget who Vriska ever was."

"I have to work tomorrow."

"So? You've gone to work with a hangover before. Dude, stop being a partypooper and get that fine ass over here."

You hear him sigh. "Fine, Dave." Yes!

—

He shows up, and you can tell hes still upset. His eyes are red and and he sighs when you push him onto the couch. You were right, he needs to relax. 

You find four beers and a half bottle of wine left from when Rose was last over hidden in the back of your fridge. Digging through your cupboards, you fine a few more bottles of various forms of alcohol. On your way back out to the living room, you grab the bottle of vodka you bought this morning.

You flop onto the couch next to him and hand him a beer. He half smiles and opens the can. "Thanks, Dave, this was actually a pretty good idea.'

"S'not a problem, bro. This is two days in a row now that we've gotten wasted. Should be fun."

"Yup." He chuckles at that and you mentally pat yourself on the back for getting him in a better mood.

—

"Daaaaaaaaaave, I'm huuuungry." John is sprawled across your lap, watching whatever shitty movie he found on Netflix. Your trying to find your vodka bottle. 

"Joooohn, get your fat ass up and get your own food. I'm tryin to find my drink."

"I think its under my back, somewhere."

"Dude, get your ass off my fuckin booze!"

"Then get me fooooooood."

"I can't get you food with your ass on my lap."

"Actually its my head."

"Fucking christ. Get the fuck off my lap."

"Fiiiiine." He starts squirming into an upright position, elbowing your balls in the process. You double over and he looks up at you with a confused expression. You glare and shove at his shoulder. "Bro, you just elbowed my fuckin dick. Get the fuck off."

"Do you want me to kiss it better?" He smirks at you and you splutter a negitive. He grins before trotting off to the kitchen, leaving you bright red and in pain. You had forgotten that John was a flirty drunk, holy shit.

He comes back as you retrieve your bottle, a sandwich in hand. You shoot him a dirty look. "Where's mine? You are the shittiest wife ever."

"Oh fuck you, Dave. Make your own food."

"Naw. That's lame."

John flops back into your lap, and you can't help but notice that his hand is over yours. Suddenly he sits up.

"We should play a game!"

"Uh, I don't have any games. Unless you wanna play Xbox."

"Ugh, you suck." He leans back to lay his head in your lap, but instead smacks his head into yours. You wince and rub the abused spot. You barely catch the mischievous glint in John eye, before he sits up and slaps your hand away.

"Hey, what the fuck?! I'm tryin to inspect the dam-" You stop short when he kisses the side of your head.

"See, I kissed it aaaaaaaall better."

"Uh....... why?"

"Because it's the nice thing to do." Suddenly he looks serious. "I think I bumped somethin else too." Before you can comprehend, his lips are pressed to yours and he's kissing you. Holy fucking shit, John Egbert is kissing you. Aaaand you are just sitting there.

Rather than continuing to be unresponsive, you kiss him back, one of your hands making its way to the back of his neck, the other grabbing hold of the hand it was still resting on.

He smiles against your lips, before pulling away. "Ha. I knew it wasn't meaningless."

"Huh." Very eloquent, Dave. Nice job, master wordsmith.

"The kiss last night. You tried to claim that it didn't mean anything. I knew it was bullshit."

"Well....... alright fine. Ya got me, I've had a huge homo crush on you for like, three years. Happy now?" You know your face is bright red, and you wait for him to run away. Instead he leans in to kiss you again. It's short and chaste, and when you lean away, he's grinning.

"I'm glad. Otherwise this would be pretty awkward." This time you arent caught off guard when he kisses you, and you instantly reciprocate. 

The rest of the night is spent watching shitty movies and making out on your couch, long after you run out of drinks. Finally you both pass out, John's head dropping onto your shoulder, his hand in yours.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fyi, this isnt the end. Theres still five more chspters and a lot more drama.


	6. Officially going on hiatus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> what is inspiration and how do i

okay so this obviously isnt a new chapter. i really like the idea i had for this fic but i really lack motivation to work on it. im hoping i can eventually come back to finish this but its possible that it may end up going incompleted. sorry if any of you actually liked this fic.

i dunno, if you have any questions you can always hit me up on my tumblr, leedsichthyss (come yell at me or whatever)

bye guys

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, so first of all, I know this whole chapter sounds really choppy and fast paced. That was kind of my intention. This is from Dave's point of view and he is drunk off his ass, so I tried to convey that. I have personally never been drunk, so this is my best guess.
> 
> Second, I cannot guarantee regular updates, or even updates at all for that matter. But I'll try my best, and maybe this'll turn out better than it seems.


End file.
